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From: guest (Mike)
, 44 months, post #1 |
I've been using writing.com for years of reading
possession/expansion based stories (which is damn near unusable). I
was unable to change anything because the process of making on a
account is so buggy. Now though, I finally got into the system and
have started making chapters.
Now I'm not a gold star writer but I think I'm getting a bit better
each time. I try to make the chapters long to screw the endless
"pay for membership" messages you get and have to refresh bomb them
20+times to continue.
My chapters start at the links below
The Body Possession Powers
https://www.writing.com/main/interactive-story/item_id/1210573-The-Body-Possession-Powers/action/view/chapter_map/13321212122
Possessed Body Parts
https://www.writing.com/main/interactive-story/item_id/1932178-Possessed-Body-Parts/action/view/chapter_map/14332
In Control
https://www.writing.com/main/interactive-story/item_id/1740101-In-Control/map/125
"Kim" in "In Control" looks like this
https://www.hairstyleslife.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/05/Chic-Red-Pixie-Short-Hairstyles-for-Oval-Faces.jpg
And "Veronica" look like this
https://24myfashion.com/2016/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/tight-maxi-dresses-tumblr-2016-2017-3.jpg
Tell me what you think
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From: guest (wubbalubbadubdub)
, 44 months, post #2 |
There's some good writing you got, enough to visualize the story
scene...
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From: guest (wubbalubbadubdub)
, 44 months, post #3 |
If you got the time could you help me continue my chapters in The
Transplant?
My chapter started here:
https://www.writing.com/main/interactive-story/item_id/1974478-The-Transplant/cid/2776526
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From: Valkan
, 44 months, post #4 |
If you're looking for honest thoughts, then my main note to the
both of you would be to work on your grammar. The grammar and
punctuation mistakes take me out of the story. Maybe use something
like grammarly before publishing your chapters.
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From: guest (Mike)
, 44 months, post #5 |
Yeah... I know, but the pages were so long and the errors fly under
the radar when you're two paragraphs down.
I'd correct them, but only the author can edit chapters
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From: guest (Mike)
, 44 months, post #6 |
And... Wubba
I'll try, but I prefer building off blank A,B and C choices so I
can have more freedom. I'll see what I can do though.
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From: guest (wubbalubbadubdub)
, 44 months, post #7 |
Ok cool
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From: guest
, 44 months, post #8 |
And, uh... for anyone else commenting.
Can I get in trouble for using pics of people's faces like that?
The two girl pics at the bottom of my post?
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From: guest (wubbalubbadubdub)
, 44 months, post #9 |
No, no trouble
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From: Nptox18
, 44 months, post #10 |
First of all thanks Mike for posting on my story...
Second, i like your ideas in writing...some ponctuation here and
there, and sometimes some phrasing could be improved, but not
bad...
Have a nice day and best regards...
PS: If possible always leave two options at the end of each
chapter, if anyone would like to continue your previous post but
with a different idea...
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From: guest (Jayzie)
, 44 months, post #11 |
I despise writing.com. Every time I go on there I get that stupid
error message about how it's temporarily unavailable.
But I'm sure your chapters are great. Perhaps I'll see them on
another site some day.
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From: guest (wubbalubbadubdub)
, 44 months, post #12 |
Anyone here gift me a membership on writing.com, just wanna say
thanks.
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From: guest (wubbalubbadubdub)
, 44 months, post #13 |
Anyone here gift me a membership on writing.com. Just wanna say
thanks.
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From: guest (Mike)
, 44 months, post #14 |
Which one was that, post 10?
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