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From: barackobrahma
, 88 months, post #21 |
Luv, and thats right the problem... are the others fake? Are they
not worthy be called real?
That will arise a lot of anger, it's not just being touchy. Be
nice!
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From: Lady Sekhmet
, 88 months, post #22 |
As a horse I resent this attempt at separating visitors into human
gender categories.
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From: MissMako
, 88 months, post #23 |
There was no "real" need to add "Real" IMO other than to offend.
That's not cool.
- Miss Mako -
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From: guest (Luv_To_Switch_Bods)
, 88 months, post #24 |
My question is then if we're going to split hairs here
then what are we supposed to call genetically born
females?
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From: Lady Sekhmet
, 88 months, post #25 |
Life is too short to be spent being offended or pursuing social
justice. Work hard, play hard. That's all that matters in the post
Obama era. The age of the SJW has past.
Also, don't feed the trolls.
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From: MissMako
, 88 months, post #26 |
Easy for a horse to say Lady S ;)
- Miss Mako -
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From: Lady Sekhmet
, 88 months, post #27 |
Just call it horse sense :P
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From: MissMako
, 88 months, post #28 |
Seriously... I appreciate Luv_To_Switch_Bods... that you reached
out to ask this. In my opinion - I think it's okay to use the terms
"Cis-Female" or even "Genetically Born Female" like you did above.
If you wanted to separate Transgender Women from this ratio
inquiry.
For me personally - I am legally and physically a female now. I
live like one. I get treated like one. And 99% of my family -
friends and peers don't even consider me Transgender anymore. When
someone uses the word "Real" Female - it has a negative tone to it
for people like myself. As if I'm tricking people and not really a
"Real" Female - when in all intents and purposes - I actually am.
The world does not treat me nor looks at me like a Male. It sees me
as a physical and social Female.
I don't expect Non-Transgender or Cis-People to understand this.
And yes... I will shine a spotlight on it because it matters. Maybe
not to those who've never had to struggle with Gender Dysphoria and
Suicide in their life because of it. And that's why it's up to
people like me - to at least speak up and inform those who are
willing to listen and have empathy.
Hugs ;)
- Miss Mako -
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From: guest
, 88 months, post #29 |
Exactly, MM. The question is why does it *matter* if we are talking
"cis-women" or not and where is the line drawn. As I said, I know
people who were assigned female at birth who are missing a few
internal organs as well as some inter-sexed people and some people
who, despite being female in every physical sense, were raised as
male and some people who are XY but were raised female -- and
appeared to be in every way -- as well as vice versa. I was amazed
to discover all the variations and how easy it was to run across
these people once most of society stopped wanting to "shame" them
for not being "normal."
So, you can't ask a question like that without specifying *raised*
socially as a female (becoming harder to define for children these
days), *physically* female (and a good definition of what, exactly,
that means) or both...
But, as I say, just the fact that someone *cares* to make that
distinction implies a segregation / prejudice of a sort.
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From: guest
, 88 months, post #30 |
Oh, and no intention to harp on this -- since genetics don't always
dictate physical sex -- I also know LOTS of people who don't know
their genome. So I know very few people who can be sure they are
"genetically born females."
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From: barackobrahma
, 88 months, post #31 |
That means I cannot tell that I am a genetically born human? OH MY
DOG!!!! LIFE CHANGING! :P
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From: Lady Sekhmet
, 88 months, post #32 |
>since genetics don't always dictate physical sex
Actually, genetics absolutely dictate physical sex, it's one of the
things genes do very well. And as far as being sure, it's a safe
bet that whatever bits you were born with are the correct ones for
your genome.
Now, who you "think" you are, that's another matter. Not hard to
imagine that visitors to this particular site have some interesting
ideas along those lines.
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From: MissMako
, 88 months, post #33 |
On a biological level - the gender in my brain has never connected
with that of the physical "genitalia" I was born with. I spent
years with several medical doctors - psychiatrists and therapists
undergoing medical tests and psychiatric evaluations.
Sure I had "ideas" about it all (hence decades of making TF
content). But I did not want to self diagnosis myself. I NEEDED the
medical community to come back and tell me not only WHY I was
struggling so much but also WHAT I needed to do to help stop that
daily conflict within me - which was tearing me apart. And I needed
multiple voices. Not just one.
Even looking back at my Video Blogs - I claimed Transitioning was
not for me and fought against the idea purely because I was
"conditioned" by everyone around me to BE A BOY - to make everyone
else feel better around me cause that's what the BOOK COVER showed
everyone since day one. Act like a girl - and I got teased - shamed
or quickly "corrected" by the adults in my life. This went on for
years and years and was something I self-discovered during my
psychiatric sessions.
I was told on a biological level - while I was developing in my
mother's womb - my brain and body did not sync up. This is RARE but
it does happen. And this idea of "who I think I am" goes even
deeper than the simple surface level stuff of gender expression.
Cross Dressing did absolutely nothing for me. It was my own body
that I was at war with since I was born (and only got worse when
puberty hit - which led to attempted suicides).
I can only try and explain my own personal journey. And without a
doubt - my transition worked for me. That daily struggle is gone.
So it was the right solution for me specifically.
What I find alarming - is when others who have no idea what it's
like to have what I've been dealing with - seem to know more than I
do. Seem to belittle or claim I'm just doing this cause I wanna get
into the Girls Bathroom and rape them (WTF?). Claim there is no
such thing as GENDER in the brain - that it only exists in your
genitalia - and therefor you are not a REAL female. We seem to live
in an age where "everyone" is an expert at things they've never had
to deal with in REAL LIFE. Not everything we read on the internet
is correct and as we've seen recently - is often propaganda fuel to
help support people's beliefs or opinions rather than supporting
facts. Information is often even outdated when it comes to medical
and scientific research.
And yet here I am. Someone who has been in this community for
decades. Spent countless dollars and years working with some of the
best qualified and known professionals in The United States. I've
been asked to be a spokesperson for the TG community politically
for who I am and what I know. I've been asked to be featured in
documentaries and TV shows for who I am and what I know. And yet -
at the end of the day - I just want to live my life as a normal
WOMAN.
But I keep finding myself getting pulled back into conversations,
political debates and on the defensive with countless others out
there who want to deny me equal rights or want to make a point in
front of others that I'm "Not A Real Woman." And then turn right
around and point fingers back claiming "You're being so sensitive
and touchy about it" It's a low brow thing to do IMO. To believe
the negative reaction one gets is the other person's fault and not
yours.
Why? Why does this matter so much as to make people wanna
"demonize" someone like me? How does my solution to fixing myself
and being a Happy Female offend so many? Why does it matter that is
has to be such a hot topic issue for people to want to call me out
or want to kill me (and yes... I have had numerous death threats
both in real life and online since I transitioned). You see the
irony right? At a time I am now no longer suicidal - I've had legit
threats - with the police involved - of people wanting to kill me
for being "Transgender".
People often say "You chose to be this way"... and my response is
"No. Wrong. I wouldn't wish what I've had on anyone. I didn't
choose to be this way. I was BORN this way." (Oh no... now I'm
quoting Lady Gaga :)
So to get back on topic with the thread (after doing a major side
step) - I do and always will consider myself ONE of the FEMALES
that come to visit this site and many others.
(Mic Drop)
- Miss Mako -
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From: guest (troll)
, 88 months, post #34 |
Nice
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From: Lady Sekhmet
, 88 months, post #35 |
It's a tired subject to be sure, but what we do know is that there
are women who feel they are fat when they are skinny, that there
are people who consider a limb to be not part of their body, etc.
We don't encourage anorexia, nor do we amputate a leg because the
patient insists it isn't theirs due to a case of body dysmorphic
disorder. We acknowledge that these are psychological problems and
treat them accordingly.
I've actually had a considerable amount of experience with cd folk,
dq's, and ts's in Chicago and in LA... and without exception, not a
single one of them is truly female in the broad sense of the term.
They can't be. They all lack the socialization and physical
acclimation that women attain during their lifetimes. The earlier
they start the closer they can come of course, but in all cases,
certainly with those who start after puberty, they can never truly
be women, only a sort of mimic's approximation of how they
themselves envision a woman should be.
This is by no means to say they can't be happy and live perfectly
normal lives (though this too his often not the case - the suicide rate of post ops is still many times higher than the
norm
), only that they can never attain what it is they feel was their
birthright. Not everything can be fixed with a bit of drugs and
surgery, especially when the root problem is one of the mind. Many
know this to be true and simply don't care - close enough is good
enough for them. But for those who really think they can erase
decades of upbringing and social behavior, when reality strikes it
can be very painful.
Now those who have followed me on this board for many many years
know I have a love of the idea of equine/anthro transformation, but
everyone including myself would consider it crazy to actually try
to attain such a goal. It's neither practical, possible, nor sane.
These are just desires of the mind to be kept very separate from
what we know to be reality. TS's have a similar desire but because
it's closer to being attainable, and because we live in a society
that not only doesn't discourage it but in some cases celebrates it
as being special, even heroic, many actually make the attempt. But
it's a dangerous and often deadly game to play, trying to fulfill a
fantasy like that and it's something that shouldn't be glorified or
encouraged as it is today.
I consider Miss Mako a good friend who I've worked with in the past
and I wish her the very best. But I always feel a word of warning
is important when this topic comes up. Beware, beware the passions
of the mind! Beyond that, well everyone is responsible for their
own future - I wash my hooves, err hands, of the issue.
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From: MissMako
, 88 months, post #36 |
Hugz LS :)
- Miss Mako -
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From: guest (Cathy)
, 88 months, post #37 |
Miss Mako, that's a familiar story. With the exception of suicide
attempts, I could almost have written what you said above.
Lady Sekhmet, I don't see that "the root problem is one of the
mind." I simply see it as a conflict of mind and body. Neither is
right and neither is wrong. They just don't match.
It's been shown (though debated?) that the body and the mind
differentiate (between male and female) at different times during
fetal development and that both are influenced by hormones.
Therefore, it should be quite possible that someone has a mind that
goes one way and a body goes the other.
Since my transition, I have had many people tell me that they can't
imagine that I ever passed as a male. With a few small exceptions,
my body size and structure is more in line with female than male.
What makes me real or not real? I have no idea. And each person
might have their own definition... This is a debate that, until we
have medical proof one way or the other it's likely that neither
side will be convinced that they are wrong.
I'm just glad that everything legally and socially shows me as no
different than any other woman despite the fact that, like many
other women, I can no longer reproduce. I just had a different
change of life than most of them did. :)
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From: guest (barackobrahma)
, 88 months, post #38 |
Someday, I hope, humanity will be able to change someones shape to
its desires or needs whenever they need or wants to change its
shape.
I also hope to be alive by them. Will be fun. =]
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From: guest (tru1)
, 88 months, post #39 |
real man = born with penis
real woman = born with vagina
\
not an insult, just truth...deal with it
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From: guest (tru2)
, 88 months, post #40 |
tru1 = arrogant sack of water
not an insult, just truth...deal with it
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