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From: Forestier
, 101 months, post #161 |
You don't know what the thread this message was taken from was
about. Some messages may have touched this subject...
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From: Forestier
, 101 months, post #162 |
Can anyone (preferably a post-op MTF) explain what Harpon could
mean?
"Not having a penis helps me endure a lot of things I couldn't have
as a man- and some of those things have even presented themselves
as intentionally trying to induce regret."
Here:
http://www.crossdreamers.com/2009/08/autogynephilia-defined.html
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From: guest (Kathie)
, 101 months, post #163 |
I can think of an example that I might describe that way. The other
day I was getting a tour of a facility and the gentleman giving me
the tour was very much talking down to me (I sensed it was because
he assumed I did not know much about the topic because "I'm only a
woman."). At one point, I asked a question (sincerely) which he
realized could only come from someone who knew something about the
topic already and he looked shocked. I believe he said something
like "Oh! Apparently you know something about this." To which I
replied "it's my field."
I believe that that would have been much more difficult for a man
to tolerate (most, probably including me 15 years ago, would have
been very insulted). I actually have mixed feelings when things
like this happen -- as annoying as it is, it also makes it clear
that I am definitively seen as a woman.
And, it can also been see as "intentionally trying to induce
regret" in that other, whom I know have had experiences like this,
sometimes see this as a reminder than, in many way, women are
treated as second class citizens. This could cause some to feel
some regret.
But I have no idea if this is the kind of thing that Harpon meant.
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From: guest
, 101 months, post #164 |
http://shitpeoplesaytowomendirectors.tumblr.com/post/132668063175/accountmadejusttotellsomeonetoge
Well, believe it or not, this example is even more egregious than
yours.
"When my wife transitioned, working in tech, she found that her
coworkers and subordinates did start treating her differently. She
even had one guy working under her who tried to tell her how to use
a piece of software that she herself had taught him only three
months before."
That tumblr is full of examples of behaviour like that but this one
particularly stood out.
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From: guest (Pip)
, 101 months, post #165 |
Forestier: I accept I may be wrong. I based my comment on the good
number of posts by Trans women and a good number of posts from
people saying that they are Trans women, but other evidence later
suggest they are not... and the former group rarely seem to mention
toiletry habits.
Kathie: I do get your mixed feelings, I always imagine if I
transisition I'd experience the same mixed feelings - but I bet the
positive feelings the 'at least they see me as..." wear off
sometime and you are just left with the irritation!
The stories you all tell, and the cartoon posted by Guest are very
instructive. I just hope I'm never that jerk who asks women
demeaning questions but I fear I may carry some programming that
makes me so.
Oh course, sometimes things are not always quite as they seem.. A
few years ago I had this phone conversation with my friend Jenny
me: I've bought a new car
Jenny: Oh what sort of car
me: A blue car
Jenny: Tutt... Just because I'm a woman, you think I wont be able
to understand about makes and models of car. Typical Man.
Me: But I DON'T understand models and makes of car! Just because
you think I'm a man you think I should. I'm not a typical man at
all!
And its true, talking to her I'd forgotten the actual make of car
I'd bought that day. Maybe other men would do the same, not sure...
Of course the guys who ask you (and Crissie in the Cartoon) silly
questions may just be jerks!
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From: guest (Kathie)
, 101 months, post #166 |
Of course. Others assuming that you do know something can be just
as insulting or annoying as others assuming that you don't. And I'm
guessing that what you just described, Pip, is probably something
that a lot of FTMs experience that might be the counterpart to what
I described.
By the way, since my post regarding that story, another similar one
has happened. It's, honestly, almost a daily occurrence if I pay
attention looking for it.
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From: guest
, 101 months, post #167 |
The one where the guy tried to tell someone how to use a piece of
software that they themselves had taught him just 3 months
previously was someone being particularly dumb.
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